Having kids, father gets no say ?

Hey, there's been cases of sperm donors getting held liable for child support. That would be worse.

Pregnancy is always a risk. You gotta be ready to deal with that. Kinda part of why I don't believe in banging random people but these days most people don't agree with my view point. And no, I'm not religious in any way.

If your buddy wanted to be 100% sure he never had kids he shoulda got snipped. Although I've heard it can be hard to find a doctor that will do it on a child-less man under 30.

You can try to convince your girl to get an IUD which is even more effective than the pill but, from what I hear, most of them don't like the idea of getting something implanted up in there all the time.

I guess I'm lucky in that my gf wants kids even less than me and we've already discussed how things will get taken care of if there's an "accident". Unfortunately (or fortunately, as it prevents the situation we're discussing) she also won't let me near her without a rubber for the most part.
 
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unL33T said:
If your buddy wanted to be 100% sure he never had kids he shoulda got snipped. Although I've heard it can be hard to find a doctor that will do it on a child-less man under 30.
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Try under 40-45. I've been wanting the snip for the last 10 years and all the docs I've talked to in KW won't do it yet (I'm 41) 'cause I'm single without kids.
 
CruisnGrrl said:
actually some one sabotaging your brakes before you let them on your bike with you would be a better analogy, you chose to let them on and didn't do a walk around....
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So you're saying if someone cuts your brakes/pokes holes in your rubbers it's your fault because you weren't looking for that?

I have also heard of the crazy chicks that poke holes in rubbers. Glad I've never dated one.
 
Bigevildoer said:
Try under 40-45. I've been wanting the snip for the last 10 years and all the docs I've talked to in KW won't do it yet (I'm 41) 'cause I'm single without kids.
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Lamesauce. I've considered it and I'm only 26. Gf said she knew a guy that has all kinds of mental/psychological disabilities but is smart enough to know he is too crazy to ever raise a kid and still couldn't find a doctor that would do it. I think he was 23 at the time though.
 
unL33T said:
I guess I'm lucky in that my gf wants kids even less than me and we've already discussed how things will get taken care of if there's an "accident". Unfortunately (or fortunately, as it prevents the situation we're discussing) she also won't let me near her without a rubber for the most part.
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All your discussions won't matter any more if you have an accident. At that point she'll make a new decision, and things change a lot when there's a little human growing inside you. Maybe she'll go along with your agreement, maybe not. It won't be in your control at that point. I wish I had a nickel for every guy who THOUGHT they had an agreement prior to a pregnancy, and then found themselves paying for child support.
 
What a bastard......that child is going to be.
 
Duster929 said:
All your discussions won't matter any more if you have an accident. At that point she'll make a new decision, and things change a lot when there's a little human growing inside you. Maybe she'll go along with your agreement, maybe not. It won't be in your control at that point. I wish I had a nickel for every guy who THOUGHT they had an agreement prior to a pregnancy, and then found themselves paying for child support.
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This.

Until you're in that situation, you won't know.
 
LiNK666 said:
Gotta agree that he shouldn't give up school. If she's got baby blindless then play hardball with her. Ignore her and refuse to pay anything. Even if she drags him to court and he has no job then they can't garnish any wages. There will be a judgement granted against him, but that's based on his income. If he's in school and not working then he doesn't have to worry much about it.
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Correct me if I am wrong, but in Ontario, if you can't pay the child support, your driver's license is suspended.
How the two relate? No idea.
Also makes it hard for people who rely on driving to make a living to begin with.

I know someone who is a contractor and relies on his truck to haul his tools/material to jobsites.
Has been behind on his child support for...5 years now?
Been driving with a suspended license for....5 years now?
Insurance companies don't insure suspended drivers.
Yeah, he's an idiot, I know.


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Confirmed that you get your driver's license can be suspended.

If support payments are not being made according to the terms of a court order or separation agreement that has been filed with the court, the FRO or the support recipient can take steps to collect money that is owed. This may include getting payments directly from the support payor’s employer, bank garnishments or filing writs against property that the support payor owns. The FRO can also ask the court to suspend a payor’s driver’s licence if payments are not being made.
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TheDirty said:
What's awesome is when a guy raises kids for years, thinking they are his own only to find out they aren't and is still responsible for child support payments.

Eh, I still wouldn't trade away standing to pee and relative sanity for the right to choose whether to keep a kid or not.
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How about dating a girl who already has kids from previous... live with her and kids for a couple of years.... break up, split up, etc.... and having to pay for thse kids afterwards!?
 
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raginduck said:
How about dating a girl who already has kids from previous... live with her and kids for a couple of years.... break up, split up, etc.... and having to pay for thse kids afterwards!?
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There is no law stating that you have too. The only thing you might have to pay is Spousal support if you married the mother and you made a lot more then she did.

My buddy I guess is going to stick by her. They are still talking everything over, but as far as still going to school, he does not want to get into loans and so fourth UNLESS he has too. He saved up enough for first year ( 12 K or so ) and then see about next year. Such a tough situation, and although he is one of my best friends, I can say without a doubt I am glad I am not in his position.

Someone mentioned it, and I totally agree that if the male doesn't wish to stand beside the girl having the kid, he should be off paying Child Support. This would really be a reality check for even women who just want to have kids to find the right guy. It might mean less one nighters for guys, but for society, probably the best thing going if we can lower the unwanted population. Any chick that wants to have a kid from a one night stand is severely messed in the head in this day and age.
 
Dr.Manhattan said:
as far as still going to school, he does not want to get into loans and so fourth UNLESS he has too. He saved up enough for first year ( 12 K or so ) and then see about next year.
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If there is one thing that is worth investing in and taking a loan its education.
 
i wasn't sure about my kid... but he's turning out to be the best life schooling i ever got. ;-)
 
RockerGuy said:
The guy should just RUN!!!

Declare bankruptcy or something :D
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They have decent schools in the UK. He should take his money and run.
Good beers too.
 
Find a woman who's already collecting alimony and child support and live with them. Then it shouldn't hurt so bad on your end. That and/or part-time studies in the evening - it'll take you longer, but the destination should be the same. May even be that you were taking the road anyway. Go with the flow - you have to look at the situation as a set-back, not a death sentence.
 
I am homosexual so this is a unknown issue to me. LOL
 
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