Having kids, father gets no say ?

ariesmars said:
In the matter of abortion.

Giving up responsibility financially.

Ummm no.
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Given that the government (ie. 'the rest of us') frequently end up footing the bill when it's 'mutually agreed to give up financial responsibility', I don't think that should be left solely up to the birth parents either.
 
Bigevildoer said:
OK, I saw on the TMP post that you have daughters. Now, HYPOTHETICALLY speaking, would you be so quick to pass judgement on one of your kids if she got accidentally knocked up, had a secret abortion and came clean to you after the fact?

You're being VERY judgemental and rather rude - just don't be upset if someone does the same thing with you.
For example, I have the exact opposite view that you have (abortion is fine and dandy and can save a ton of problems for both potential parents etc), yet I don't make harsh judgements (could say many things and belittle you simply because you're a pro-lifer, but it would not be practical or productive in this thread) about you. You have a different opinion, which I accept. You should accept and respect other people's opinions even if they fly in the face of your morals.

Amazon stated what she might do if she got pregnant. It would ruin her life at this time - put her into a situation she doesn't want to be in, and may not be capable of (no offense, Amazon). If somebody has an accident, and they're not capable of raising a child, should they really force a life of misery upon the kid?

We're all different and have different morals, wants, needs and goals. That's what makes us all unique. IF we all believed and behaved the same, we'd be awfully boring.

I've donned my asbestos suit, as I am fully expecting to be flamed by oily for my response... so go ahead.... ;-)
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First let me say , can you ****ing read. read the bold part.
accidentally falling down stairs could possibly be more dangerous to her well being then having an abortion, and that was the comment that upset me. Second, if any of my daughters got pregnant and had a secret abortion Yes I would take the same position with them, and if they even mentioned they would accidentally fall down stairs to cause a miscarriage I would not only dis own her, I would kick her out of my house. I am not sure if you know how dangerous a miscarriage is, but I do. I almost lost my mom to a miscarriage yrs ago. In fact I did lose her, as she was clinically dead, but fortunately some how she came back, when I say clinically dead I mean covered over, time of death was recorded. I have stated on many times in this thread, that it's a woman's body and her choice, whether I agree with it or not. So next time before you try and play the cool guy, make sure you learn how to read. Did that char your suit :)
 
oilycreek said:
am not sure if you know how dangerous a miscarriage is, but I do. I almost lost my mom to a miscarriage yrs ago. In fact I did lose her, as she was clinically dead, but fortunately some how she came back, when I say clinically dead I mean covered over, time of death was recorded.
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Wow. If you don't want to give specifics, I certainly understand, but I'm curious what went wrong? My wife and I have unfortunately had to go through a couple miscarriages, and while emotionally shattering, the physical effects were minimal.
 
oilycreek said:
First let me say , can you ****ing read. read the bold part.
accidentally falling down stairs could possibly be more dangerous to her well being then having an abortion, and that was the comment that upset me. Second, if any of my daughters got pregnant and had a secret abortion Yes I would take the same position with them, and if they even mentioned they would accidentally fall down stairs to cause a miscarriage I would not only dis own her, I would kick her out of my house.
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Ever heard of sarcasm?

Guess not.
 
oilycreek said:
...if they even mentioned they would accidentally fall down stairs to cause a miscarriage I would not only dis own her, I would kick her out of my house...
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You would do that even if they just mentioned such a thing?

I guess there's no freedom of speech in your house. You're a tough dad - I hope you let them know they better be careful what they say or they might end up on the street.

I can't decide what's worse, a daughter threatening to harm herself, or a father denying a daughter based on something she said. I guess you've drawn the line though. Everyone has their own personal standards of ethics, I guess.
 
klr_guy said:
Wow. If you don't want to give specifics, I certainly understand, but I'm curious what went wrong? My wife and I have unfortunately had to go through a couple miscarriages, and while emotionally shattering, the physical effects were minimal.
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She got pregnant after having me, she had a miscarriage, and hemorraged really bad, and pretty much bled to death by time she got to hospital. I was about 19 when she had her stroke, and was visiting her in hospital, when this young nurse came in, she was all excited, saying to my mom, you died in here a long time ago, my mom was like ya, she was like, no you really died, my mom was I know, then she says I have never met anyone that died before lol.
 
Duster929 said:
You would do that even if they just mentioned such a thing?

I guess there's no freedom of speech in your house. You're a tough dad - I hope you let them know they better be careful what they say or they might end up on the street.

I can't decide what's worse, a daughter threatening to harm herself, or a father denying a daughter based on something she said. I guess you've drawn the line though. Everyone has their own personal standards of ethics, I guess.
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There's lots of freedom of speech in my house. There how ever no tolerance for threatening to do something that could impact my entire family out of selfishness.
It has nothing to do with being a tough dad, it has everything to do with respect. I suspect you don't have any kids. I have full custody of my kids, and we have an amazing relationship. We talk about everything, no topic is off limits, so they know they don't have to hide anything from me. You can only hope you'll be half the father I am.
 
oilycreek said:
I am glad it does, but you have no idea what you're talking about. Since you are dating Amazon, I understand why she wouldn't want to get pregnant.
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Or I don't want to get pregnant because I'm 18, in school still, with horrible finances and student debt. Why would I want to bring a kid into a world where I can't support him and would know he was a mistake? I don't want kids, but if I ever change, I want them to go have the best up bringing they can, not one living in a box and eating KD everyday 'cause that's all I can afford
 
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oilycreek said:
There's lots of freedom of speech in my house. There how ever no tolerance for threatening to do something that could impact my entire family out of selfishness.
It has nothing to do with being a tough dad, it has everything to do with respect. I suspect you don't have any kids. I have full custody of my kids, and we have an amazing relationship. We talk about everything, no topic is off limits, so they know they don't have to hide anything from me. You can only hope you'll be half the father I am.
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You've already stated that this is not true. You said you would disown your kids and kick them out if they mentioned a particular thing. I'd say that's off limits.

I certainly do hope that I'll be at least half the father that you are.
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