That is actually the only way to protect yourself. Completely agree
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Should men enter into marriage? Is it in their interest?
- Thread starter -D-
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That is actually the only way to protect yourself. Completely agree
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But then it's highly penalizing for her and extremely one sided no?
Think third party.
When two people sign a contract they have specific rights and limits. A third person outside of the contract has no limits. They didn't sign away any rights.
The third parties I refer to are the children and family court makes sure they get taken care of regardless of what it does to the parents. Children of divorce have more rights than kids in a solid marriage. COD's can demand university education be paid by the parents, usually dad. The court doesn't care if dad can't afford bus fare.
Sadly, sometimes dad is so strapped financially he can't afford quality visitation. Yeah he gets the kids every second weekend but can't afford to take them anywhere.
I don't see why men shouldn't get married if they want to get married. Yes there's a chance it won't work out, yes there's a chance someone lied, but honestly I'd prefer to go my life trying to make a go at it instead of being eternally scared that:
- she will leave,
- she will cheat,
- I will cheat,
- I will leave,
- Kids happen unwanted,
- Kids don't happen wanted....
there's so many variations to this that really...you do the best you can to find the partner that YOU want and you click with, and then go with it. Are the laws flawed, sure are. But they're there to protect those that can't protect themselves. Do they need to be modified...yes, to get rid of the gold diggers / idiots that only use the laws to be freeloaders. Not perfect. But I also don't plan on living my life in 'fear' of something not working out.
Life is hard, marriage is harder, man up and deal with it. Or don't...hide in your parents basement and play video games.
- she will leave,
- she will cheat,
- I will cheat,
- I will leave,
- Kids happen unwanted,
- Kids don't happen wanted....
there's so many variations to this that really...you do the best you can to find the partner that YOU want and you click with, and then go with it. Are the laws flawed, sure are. But they're there to protect those that can't protect themselves. Do they need to be modified...yes, to get rid of the gold diggers / idiots that only use the laws to be freeloaders. Not perfect. But I also don't plan on living my life in 'fear' of something not working out.
Life is hard, marriage is harder, man up and deal with it. Or don't...hide in your parents basement and play video games.
Would anybody buy a motorcycle knowing it has a 50% chance of a catastrophic accident?
‘The fact that this is, in effect, a husband’s claim against a wife rather than the more conventional claim of a wife against husband emphatically does not call for a discount,’ [the judge] insisted.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-4280582/How-divorce-backfired-women-thanks-feminists.html
Vulcangirl
Member
It’s not only men that lose out in separations.
It’s not always women trapping men into having children. What happens when its an accident? Yes as a woman, I have the choice toabort. But morally, I may not be able tolive with that decision.
What happens when the marriage breaks down and the woman isthe one caring for her kids? The guy****s off and expects her to take care of them –financially and emotionally. Whydoes everyone assume the man is the biggest loser in these cases? How about when it’s the woman that helped theman achieve the success and assets he has. Without her, he would have been blowing any money he made.
So what if marriage is temporary? So is life. Do we not live because we know its going to end. Get married if it makes you both happy in anyway. Just know its not alwaysforever. And its not always good orhappy. If there are more good times thanbad, then its well worth it.
It’s not always women trapping men into having children. What happens when its an accident? Yes as a woman, I have the choice toabort. But morally, I may not be able tolive with that decision.
What happens when the marriage breaks down and the woman isthe one caring for her kids? The guy****s off and expects her to take care of them –financially and emotionally. Whydoes everyone assume the man is the biggest loser in these cases? How about when it’s the woman that helped theman achieve the success and assets he has. Without her, he would have been blowing any money he made.
So what if marriage is temporary? So is life. Do we not live because we know its going to end. Get married if it makes you both happy in anyway. Just know its not alwaysforever. And its not always good orhappy. If there are more good times thanbad, then its well worth it.
-D-
Banned
The reasons for marrying someone is not the topic of this discussion.
It is the legal system and how the fairness of the laws are applied AFTER the marriage/divorce.
As someone wrote, people change as they get older, and as someone else said they don't really.
Both of those answers are actually right because in the early days ppl overlooked many things e.g. he likes camping every weekend and she does not, she is into sports and he is not. As they get older they realize the past and the present e.g. opposite tastes in music, food (vegan vs. meat), working out, travel, politics, ability to have conversations...and sex.
Whatever the reason for separation is not the relevant point. It is how the law is applied.
btw Ashley Madison seems to be making a lot of money (they do tv adverts now). Divorce rate is 55% and increasing.
Again, the act of getting married and the personal reasons for it is not the central topic. It is the application of the laws or skewed laws?
-D-
Banned
Not sure where you two are going with this but let me ask you this...you walk into the shop and they tell you that $15k brand new (0km) motorcycle you are about to buy will break down in 1 year and you have to keep fixing it and repay Honda for the next 3 years because you caused it to break.
My point is, nobody tells you the back end of the effects of what can/likely happens. I think that is the point the videos are making.
This is what currently happens after, so once you know the effect you are now more informed entering into that deal.
btw- let's see how some of you view this scenario.
A guy built a home with his father and grandfather. Fast forward 15 years later.
Guy meets a girl, she moves in with him into the house he built, house is paid for, free and clear before he met her.
They are together for 1-3 years (since there is a discrepancy on what common law is).
Maybe they have 1 kid maybe they don't. Doesn't matter how the kid got there, kid is here.
Now within that 1-3 years you were married and she decided to leave (reason not relevant, no fault divorce laws).
Maybe he decides to leave, reason not relevant also.
She now makes a claim for the house. Oh, let's make this easy, they both have the same job and make the same amount of money.
Should she get that house/property?
If yes, why?
If no, why not?
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-D-
Banned
And the male can also make a claim for her pension and other assets???
Let's keep it focused, married for 3-5 years.
Well the simple answer is this is a classic "I am a victim" beta male GTAM thread. Someone wants a pat on the back and someone to say "it is OK, you are the victim, society has wronged you" and they get mad at any other opinion.
In the end there is extremely little chance a women will get pregnant if the man doesn't want to be a dad and is willing to do his part (already covered). Now if the man is stupid and takes chances, well that is another thing altogether--and it is/was a choice to be stupid. Always corner cases (immaculate conception, some Joseph guy got screwed over, should have went on Maury...) but very few and far between. (BTW, the male and female roles can be flipped and it is still true).
As for marriage, it is also a choice. The possible outcomes are well known so I have no sympathy for someone who enters said contract and it does not work out well for them because of the known possible legal outcomes. Marry someone who has the same "station" in life as you do you minimize the risk to almost zero. If as a beta male everything scares you, well I guess you have to live with that--but make your choices accordingly (and don't expect society to take care of you).
Life is about choices boys and girls, make them wisely. In the wise words of Forest Gump's mother "stupid is as stupid does."
The only possible true victims in this thread are the children, they didn't make any of the stupid decisions.
but
...at the current alimony laws when they have to pay. (from that article^)
Then there are child custody and support payment laws. Would those also be considered appalling if/when they start going the other way?
-D-
Banned
Someone posted an interested reference stat...85% of kids are awarded to the mother sole custody (presuming I read what they posted correctly)
How does one interpret this?
Only 15% of men are responsible or only 15% of women are irresponsible?
If that is the case then one can argue that women knew what they were getting into by having children.
Women made a decision based on an 85% stat that they will be on the hook for said child/children.:lmao::lmao:
I kid with the above post, but am serious as to how to interpret that 85% stat.
Either 85% of men truly suck as a parent or something doesn't seem balanced???
How does one interpret this?
Only 15% of men are responsible or only 15% of women are irresponsible?
If that is the case then one can argue that women knew what they were getting into by having children.
Women made a decision based on an 85% stat that they will be on the hook for said child/children.:lmao::lmao:
I kid with the above post, but am serious as to how to interpret that 85% stat.
Either 85% of men truly suck as a parent or something doesn't seem balanced???
Any woman who is surprised by the laws is just as ignorant as half the men in this discussion.
The. Laws. Are. Equal.
If men wanna protect themselves they should marry an equal earner. End of discussion, really.
-D-
Banned
Ok, you have demonstrated that your perception and reality are 2 different things, lol
I will update that post to include the words marriage and divorce, it seemed implied given the topic and I did mention no fault divorce.
Common law partners in Ontario cannot make property claims. Your post didn't say anything about marriage.
I'm quoting laws, you're spewing garbage. Sorry bud but you're the one consistently posting misinformation. You watched a YouTube video and got all horny about the subject for 10 minutes but none of your statements are rooted in fact.
