jokes

[Joe Bass]

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This one is for RockerGuy:

What do you call a Tinder date girl that doesn't put out on the first date?










You don't.
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[kellen]

What do you call a dog with no legs?






Nothing, he's not gonna come anyway

 

[inreb]

What do you call a guy with no arms and legs in a pool?













Bob.

 

[Joe Bass]

What do call a guy with no arms and legs in the ocean?



Fu**ed
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[Jayv]

What do you call a guy with no arms and legs in a pool?













Bob.

Or Clever Dick.

 

[Joe Bass]

My absolute favorite joke of all time:
Girl walks into a grocery store and proceeds to buy:
1 apple
1 pear
1 banana
1 cucumber
1 tomato
1 slice of cheese
1 slice of ham
1 bun
1 bottle of water
1 diet soda
1 yogurt


She takes it all to the checkout.
The guy at the cash starts ringing up her groceries. He looks at them, looks at her, looks at them again then says " you're single, aren't you?"
She says "yes. Did you get that from my shopping?"
He shakes his head.
"oh, is it because I don't have a ring ? on my finger?"
He shakes his head again.
"well then, I have to know, how did you know that I'm single????"
He looks her in the eye and says -
"'cause you're Fu**ing UGLY!"
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[RockerGuy]

This one is for RockerGuy:

What do you call a Tinder date girl that doesn't put out on the first date?










You don't.
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk

I hope your daughter don't read that in the next few years

 

[Joe Bass]

I hope your daughter don't read that in the next few years

Ah, lucky for me, two boys.
But, that's not the values that I am teaching them. But that's another thread.
Dems just jokes, brah!

 

[inreb]

How do you find Will Smith?






















look for fresh prints

 

[Joe Bass]

How do you find Will Smith?






















look for fresh prints

Now that is gold. Consider that stolen.

 

[inreb]

Now that is gold. Consider that stolen.

My pleasure. Stole it from a fat guy at work today. Why can't Muslims get along like this?

 

[Joe Bass]

My pleasure. Stole it from a fat guy at work today. Why can't Muslims get along like this?

Fat guys are funny.

 

[Dirty Frank]

How do you milk a sheep?












Release a new iPhone

 

[meme]

Release iPhone 7?

 

[Roasted]

 

[Baggsy]

Release iPhone 7?

Or give them a Lollipop.

 

[backmarkerducati]

Watching the news this morning they anounced that there are now two male birth control pills on the market. The first one is a day after pill, this pill changes your blood type. The second one you put in your shoe, it makes you limp.

 

[Joe Bass]

A blonde walks into a library. She walks up to the librarian standing behind the counter and says "can I get a Big Mac, medium fries and a medium diet Coke please?"
The librarian looks at her, dumbfounded and says "my dear, this is a LIBRARY!"
The blonde looks around, starts to blush and says sorry. Then she looks at the librarian again and whispers "can I get a Big Mac....."
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[Joe Bass]

A blonde is walking along the riverbank. She looks over the river and sees another blonde on the river's edge. She shouts "hey, how do you get to the other side of the river?" To which the second blonde responds "you ARE on the other side of the river!"
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[RockerGuy]

Business at the front, party at the back

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