Dirty Frank
Well-known member
Down the road we will be looking back at this as "the good old days" sad but true so hang on to those moments...
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Video games and an unrewarding life
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Too bad we never know when the ‘good ol days’ are happening….and by the time we realize it…they’re gone.
Highly recommend anyone who's "succeeded" in life but am asking themselves "why do I feel like ass constantly?" to watch the above. It's 6 hours long though.
Something that really hit home was "a person who is rich is ****** than one who is poor if they are lost in life because there is no path for the rich."
By the way, it ends with this:
That sucks.
Maybe part of this is also related to hmm, I want to say intellect, but that's not exactly right. Many people push hard to succeed, be the best they can, compare themselves to others, etc. There's another group of people that are happy as pigs in &^%% if they can meet their basic needs and don't push beyond that. Imo, the second group is more likely to be happy and mentally stable even they they are orders of magnitude down on net worth from the "succeed" crowd. Something along the lines of dumb and happy vs smart and tortured as they don't see what they are "missing". It's not directly related to intelligence though as you can have smart people that don't care and dumb people that make ungodly money by doing what they are good at. It seems to be reasonably correlated to intelligence though imo as that generally sets the group you belong too. Again, it's a continuum so the farther you are to either end, the more likely you exhibit the characteristics.
My wife and I have frequent discussions as I am playing the long game and she wants to do things now. She doesn't like hearing that a vacation now means we need to work for another year in the future. I know people that make far less and travel far more (including family) but they are relying on the future budget to balance itself and I am predicting the exact opposite and trying to set up something that relies on no outside help. It's stressful to be striving for a goal that far in the future and evaluating all of the things that can throw it off track. Blissful ignorance isn't a bad way to live.
I don't believe that.
I think happiness and contentedness have very little correlation to intellect or ambition or drive.
The core of it is that the ability to be happy is a personality trait that is unchanged by emotional or financial achievement. I've known people who are unsuccessful in relationships and/or career and they are just as miserable or as happy as those who have achieved stability in both.
If you're a glass-half-empty kind of person, you're always going to be miserable regardless of whether there's Chateau Margaux or dirty tap water in that glass.
Honestly I think you can easily argue either way and that's where the nurture vs nature arguments also come in.
I lean towards GreyGhosts stuff though because I know where I stand on the intellect scale, and how miserable I am lmao. Also, Jordan Peterson's lectures rammed "successful people are successful because they have something tormenting them so much they focused their all on solving it" into my head.
Reckful/Bryan falls under the above as well.
I lean towards GreyGhosts stuff though because I know where I stand on the intellect scale, and how miserable I am lmao. Also, Jordan Peterson's lectures rammed "successful people are successful because they have something tormenting them so much they focused their all on solving it" into my head.
Reckful/Bryan falls under the above as well.
If you can argue either way, then it must be there is no correlation... no?
Anyway, I must be dumb as rocks then, because I'm generally pretty happy in life...
If you can argue either way, then it must be there is no correlation... no?
Anyway, I must be dumb as rocks then, because I'm generally pretty happy in life...
No, it just means I'm uneducated on this subject.
You're obviously not dumb and my theory does not apply to everybody. In my experience, it reasonably fits most people I have known but there are exceptions in both directions.If you can argue either way, then it must be there is no correlation... no?
Anyway, I must be dumb as rocks then, because I'm generally pretty happy in life...
Am a happy idiot...life is good.
EDIT: I'm similar with @GreyGhost in that my wife is always 'we should go on vacation here, there, and everywhere. Why don't we go? They go. They go 3-4 times/year.'
My response is simple: They run their LOC like it's a personal bank account. You want to go? No problem. Put away enough money so it's a cash vacation, and we're good to roll. I'm not going into debt for a vacation.
EDIT: I'm similar with @GreyGhost in that my wife is always 'we should go on vacation here, there, and everywhere. Why don't we go? They go. They go 3-4 times/year.'
My response is simple: They run their LOC like it's a personal bank account. You want to go? No problem. Put away enough money so it's a cash vacation, and we're good to roll. I'm not going into debt for a vacation.
I cut ties with folk who did that or spent money to look rich earlier on because we are a combination of the people we spend our time with.
But in hindsight, that may have been another money vs fun trade.
I can't argue it's an absolute truth for the same reason. I have a friend who is academically retarded (he said no to higher education), but intellectually up there (extremely successful, builds random **** for fun, and gets decent at many hobbies without much effort) and much happier. It could simply be the universities millennials went to being too far left and that's the missing variable.
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Finding examples that support this kind of argument is Selection Bias tinged with Narcissism.
"I am smart and successful but I am unhappy, so I will seek out other examples of smart, successful, unhappy people out there, because that's the group I want to identify myself with."
Meanwhile, there's a whole demographic of poor, unsuccessful and unhappy people out there who sabotage their lives because either they're not smart or savvy enough to get or keep a steady career, or they're too emotionally stunted to realize that cussing out their boss or their date to their face, or alienating co-workers and friends will have negative consequences to their career or love-life or relationships. Then they go home and kick their dog because they hate their lives.
Again, it's conceitedness to believe that the only path to unhappiness is if you are smart enough to conceptualize existential dread. Because hey, you're smart and successful right? So your exceptional intelligence *must* be why you're unhappy.
And it's so obvious that all other paths to unhappiness just do not exist.
"I am smart and successful but I am unhappy, so I will seek out other examples of smart, successful, unhappy people out there, because that's the group I want to identify myself with."
Meanwhile, there's a whole demographic of poor, unsuccessful and unhappy people out there who sabotage their lives because either they're not smart or savvy enough to get or keep a steady career, or they're too emotionally stunted to realize that cussing out their boss or their date to their face, or alienating co-workers and friends will have negative consequences to their career or love-life or relationships. Then they go home and kick their dog because they hate their lives.
Again, it's conceitedness to believe that the only path to unhappiness is if you are smart enough to conceptualize existential dread. Because hey, you're smart and successful right? So your exceptional intelligence *must* be why you're unhappy.
And it's so obvious that all other paths to unhappiness just do not exist.
I don't disagree with you.
I'm quoting myself because I don't believe any of us are educated enough on this subject to argue either way. And personally I can't argue absolutes unless there are no exceptions, and there are too many on both ends (as @GreyGhost mentioned) to argue an absolute (which is what you are trying to refute)
Whether or not there is a generalized trend with intelligence and happiness...none of us are experts so anyone who makes an absolute statement would be a retard. There's enough material in the "big five model" to argue both ends easily on this one too. I lean towards my own bias as I openly stated earlier because we are all biased.
What I can say for certain: the combination of intelligence and an abusive/neglectful childhood is present in every example I know similar to myself.
Edit: I re-read and I think I understand what you are saying.
You believe that a neglected or an abused child becomes more emotionally screwed up as an adult if he or she is more intelligent than another neglected/abused kid that isn't as smart?
Am I getting this right?
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No lmao
The common pattern I noticed is that parental neglect and/or abuse encourages those who can execute and plan goals to create a fictional future where "once I do xyz, abc, I will be happy!.....because my entire life sucks right now." This last bit is not a teenager throwing a temper tantrum; it's because life really is ****** up and it's an "all or nothing" type of vision.
Intelligent people tend to be more successful than those who aren't, especially in our world where money is made based on how efficient you are. This means even with a **** childhood handicap, an intelligent person has a far higher chance of success than someone who is mentally slower with low conscientiousness. And by success, I mean well off enough to hit the last level of Maslow's Hierarchy of needs where the urge to self actualize is your only goal (Reckful killed himself over this, pretty sure Chester from Linkin Park was similar.)
The visualization of a better tomorrow I mentioned earlier is what actually leads to the existential angst. For example, I believed that the real world would have far less backstabbing, abuse, emotional manipulation, and just generally more respect than my childhood. I don't think I need to list the amount of backstabbing, abuse, and general disrespect that is common everyday. So once the goal is hit: what's the point to all this? Why not just cheat, kill, whatever if you can get away with it? (We've all got our own answers to this one I think.)
Those who fail to succeed can continue chasing their dream, and that journey feeds their happiness. Those who have arrived....well, Buddha was a prince and ****** off into homelessness for a reason.
I'd argue intelligent people are actually emotionally more capable than the stupid actually. Picking up patterns and manipulating people isn't any different than problem solving.
Now....whether or not they are predisposed to anti-social behavior is a pretty cool subject that I don't know **** about but my gut says they absolutely are.
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If you look at what pisses you off and really think about what those things are in the grand scheme of things and understand that most are petty then your life isn’t really that bad.
I’m currently not getting my own way with some organizational/admin aspects of my professional life. That is pissing me off.
However, no one (I’m aware of) is actively trying to hunt me down and cause me harm, no one is bombing my house, the water I drink is clean (Chateaux Margaux is for peasants
), I’m being paid, economically comfortable etc. Overall life is good and I’m actually whining about mostly inconsequential things. As long as I realize that it grounds me (a bit).
By the way, some of the happiest people I’ve ever met had nothing. No money, no education but they did/do have a fantastic and enviable approach to living.
I’m currently not getting my own way with some organizational/admin aspects of my professional life. That is pissing me off.
However, no one (I’m aware of) is actively trying to hunt me down and cause me harm, no one is bombing my house, the water I drink is clean (Chateaux Margaux is for peasants
), I’m being paid, economically comfortable etc. Overall life is good and I’m actually whining about mostly inconsequential things. As long as I realize that it grounds me (a bit).By the way, some of the happiest people I’ve ever met had nothing. No money, no education but they did/do have a fantastic and enviable approach to living.
If you look at what pisses you off and really think about what those things are in the grand scheme of things and understand that most are petty then your life isn’t really that bad.
I’m currently not getting my own way with some organizational/admin aspects of my professional life. That is pissing me off.
However, no one (I’m aware of) is actively trying to hunt me down and cause me harm, no one is bombing my house, the water I drink is clean (Chateaux Margaux is for peasants
By the way, some of the happiest people I’ve ever met had nothing. No money, no education but they did/do have a fantastic and enviable approach to living.
You're only content because you're dumb as rocks.
Like me.
luck you….I wish I lurned how too tipe and spel
With autocorrect, that must have been hard to get out.
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