Power of Attorney

ifiddles

Well-known member
A while ago my brother asked me to be his executrix, however I politely declined. Now, he's asked me to be listed as his POA, and I have until Easter weekend to let him know.

Can anyone offer insight into how intense of a role this might be? I know every situation would be different, just trying to guage how much time is involved, legal ramifications, costs, etc.

Thanks in advance.
 
Which POA? There is financial POA and medical (personal care) POA. For most people, most of the time, that shouldn't be any cost or work for you as we all hope that the person we have POA over remains capable of caring for themselves and making competent decisions. It could be very intense as you may get called upon to make life or death decisions.

Fwiw, I have POA for a few people. For my parents, my brother and I both have financial POA and either person can make the decisions (we trust each other and that simplifies things in a stressful situation). For medical, we have joint POA and must both agree. That is intended to save a lifetime of anger if one decides to go down an irreversible path.

As for legal ramifications, I don't know. I would hope that if you don't do shady things, minimal. If you have POA for someone and they have others around them that disagree with your choices, anybody can get sued for anything.
 
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It's something family, especially should do for each other.
NOT having POA in place is certainly more trouble than having it when the time comes it's needed.
Being someone's executor can involve a bit of work, but unless the estate is super complex it's not really too bad.
As executor there are all sorts of legal protections in place for you anyway.
'Been POA/executor for two people who are now deceased... It wasn't that big of a deal.
 
My experience is that the two POA roles are mostly just decision making, not consuming much time. However, particularly with personal care, your decision(s) may be with you for long afterwards. Executor role can be very time consuming and potentially complex depending on the financial situation, heirs, etc.
 
Executor role can be very time consuming and potentially complex depending on the financial situation, heirs, etc.

I found the "time" consuming part wasn't really me spending "my time" doing stuff, but rather just waiting for others to do stuff...
Things like waiting for a bank or insurance company to process whatever...
My MIL's estate was moderately complicated and it took a couple of years to completely settle, but all the delays were the result of banks, financial entities and insurance companies dropping the ball (insurance companies are the worst lol).
Other than a few phone calls/emails it was mostly just waiting for paperwork to be "processed".
Lois has been gone seven years and just last week we received a letter from RBC about updating her contact info in connection with some investment acct. she had. (when she was still alive)
I waited until I had to go to my bank branch for something else and straightened out the issue in 5 min.

Not to sound morbid, but everyone should do their family a favour and write down all their info and store it safely.
Bank accounts
Insurance policies
Account numbers
Important passwords, *especially for those of you who ask to have their browser history deleted
Basically everything they might need to know after you're tits up.
 
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Not to sound morbid, but everyone should do their family a favour and write down all their info and store it safely.
Bank accounts
Insurance policies
Account numbers
Important passwords, *especially for those of you who ask to have their browser history deleted
Basically everything they might need to know after you're tits up.
My wife and I have password managers that automatically back up so they are not device dependent. We know each others master password. That simplifies logistics as the record is automatically kept up to date (both new accounts and password changes).

We try hard to convince the old people in our lives to do similar. Nope. Piece of paper at home with notes on it. Not great but at least we know where the papers are.
 
Can anyone offer insight into how intense of a role this might be? I know every situation would be different, just trying to guage how much time is involved, legal ramifications, costs, etc.

Shouldnt be too intense.

Worst case I can think of - if he turns into a vegetable/coma state, you can decide whether or not to pull the plug.
He obviously trusts you enough to ask you. God forbid he has to ask someone else who may try to take advantage of him.

At the end of the day, blood is blood. I will gladly be POA for someone I trust and know that they would have my best interests at heart should the roles be reversed.
 
We try hard to convince the old people in our lives to do similar. Nope. Piece of paper at home with notes on it. Not great but at least we know where the papers are.

My father in law had a notebook with EVERYTHING written down.
Names and addresses of all his holdings/investments., acct. numbers... Anything/everything we needed to deal with his estate.
'made thins very easy
 
A while ago my brother asked me to be his executrix, however I politely declined. Now, he's asked me to be listed as his POA, and I have until Easter weekend to let him know.

Can anyone offer insight into how intense of a role this might be? I know every situation would be different, just trying to guage how much time is involved, legal ramifications, costs, etc.

Thanks in advance.
A lot has been covered already. I'll just emphasize that PoA is only valid until that person passes away. Once that transpired that piece of paper is worthless.

Feel free to PM me about any of this, I went through POA decisions and executor for my father's estate a few years back.
 
Worst case I can think of - if he turns into a vegetable/coma state, you can decide whether or not to pull the plug.

My wife dealt with this with her older sister... There may be differences case to case, but... If you're a rational person and take the advice of the doctor(s) involved... It's not that difficult.
The choice was perma-coma with a feeding tube or cease intervention and let nature take its course. (nature took less than 24 hours)
What would you choose..?
 
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My wife dealt with this with her older sister... There may be differences case to case, but... If you're a rational person and take the advice of the doctor(s) involved... It's not that difficult.
The choice was perma-coma with a feeding tube or cease intervention and let nature take its course. (nature took less than 24 hours)
What would you choose..?

Definitely the latter.
I'm huge believer in quality of life when it comes to these things.
 
It's something family, especially should do for each other.
NOT having POA in place is certainly more trouble than having it when the time comes it's needed.
Being someone's executor can involve a bit of work, but unless the estate is super complex it's not really too bad.
As executor there are all sorts of legal protections in place for you anyway.
'Been POA/executor for two people who are now deceased... It wasn't that big of a deal.
Wills:

I asked a friend to take me out of his will as executor because of a chit show of complications. He is dyslexic and I would have to follow his notes. He was also fixated on a financial issue ten years old and there were no records. An outsider created so much havoc in the family that communicating was like dealing with Trump.

Executors can be sued and insurance expensive, if you can get it. If there is a hint of anything wrong, the insurers decline.

My M-I-L's will took three years to settle because my B-I-L wanted to take over the estate, particularly the family home. However, he didn't want to own it.

He was deep in debt and if he inherited anything his creditors could seize it. Instead, he wanted to have use of the house for as long as he wanted, which could have been 20 to 30 years. The executor would have to baby sit the estate until then. In the end the house had to be sold to pay the legal fees and had his own challenge fees to pay on top of that. There were no winners.

POAs

POAs come to an end when the person dies and then the executor takes over. My concern would be heirs complaining that the heath care or financial diligence were poorly managed.

One of the worst problems is dementia. The person can live ten years, requiring more care each year. Pulling a plug is difficult both emotionally and legally.

There can be a problem if there are separate POAs for health and finances. One has a duty to preserve dignity of life and the other the preservation of finances. Wearing both hats makes it an internal conflict.

Good homes are incredibly expensive and less expensive ones incredibly problematic.

You can only guess what might happen. My father had Lewy body dementia and was in a home. Then they suspected he had developed cancer and was to go for tests, adding to the concerns. The day before the tests he had a fatal heart attack.

Obviously one would want to know all the details of finances and expectations.
 
@nobbie48 the fact about the will's executor possibly being sued was one of the reasons why I declined...from what I've gathered, that doesn't exist (or potentially lower) with POAs...I would like to see the details beforehand to check that all the bases (as much as can be) are covered (he's a very organized person, so I'm sure it is)...
 
@nobbie48 the fact about the will's executor possibly being sued was one of the reasons why I declined...from what I've gathered, that doesn't exist (or potentially lower) with POAs...I would like to see the details beforehand to check that all the bases (as much as can be) are covered (he's a very organized person, so I'm sure it is)...
Just a brief comment here. Anyone can sue you for any reason. Once you receive a Statement of Claim you then have to respond to it, and doing so requires hiring a lawyer to represent you. If you don't respond, the plaintiff can seek a summery judgement against you. Even if you respond the plaintiff can still elect to go to trial.

Defending yourself from a frivilous law suit is very expensive. Even if the coart awards you costs, there is no guarantee you can actually collect from the person who sued you.

Your brother might be the nicest person on earth, but who else is connected to your brother that might be an issue down the road? Only you can judge this and whether the risk is worth taking.
 
Just a brief comment here. Anyone can sue you for any reason. Once you receive a Statement of Claim you then have to respond to it, and doing so requires hiring a lawyer to represent you. If you don't respond, the plaintiff can seek a summery judgement against you. Even if you respond the plaintiff can still elect to go to trial.

Defending yourself from a frivilous law suit is very expensive. Even if the coart awards you costs, there is no guarantee you can actually collect from the person who sued you.

Your brother might be the nicest person on earth, but who else is connected to your brother that might be an issue down the road? Only you can judge this and whether the risk is worth taking.
When my 93 YO M-I-L died suddenly, in sound mind, the family seemed to pull together for a while. Then B-I-L found out he wasn't getting the lion's share and the evil came out. We then realized he had been planning things for years. Expecting to get the house he had things done when my M-I-L was still alive. To minimize his future expenses, he had her replace the roof with an expensive metal one. A 90 YO doesn't need a roof with a 50 year guarantee.

Trial outcomes are rarely black and white. In hindsight there were things that could have been done but 20 / 20 doesn't happen.
 
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@nobbie48 the fact about the will's executor possibly being sued was one of the reasons why I declined...from what I've gathered, that doesn't exist (or potentially lower) with POAs...I would like to see the details beforehand to check that all the bases (as much as can be) are covered (he's a very organized person, so I'm sure it is)...
My wife and I have the typical survivor will / POA deals. If I had to go outside that, I would pay for a lawyer to moderate a meeting with all present, so everyone understands the whole process. No "I thought you meant...."
 
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