I never heard about autism as a kid
It was never diagnosed. Heck, up until 40-50 years ago kids with even moderate behavioural issues would just be quietly shuffled off to a lunatic asylum, or "The school for defectives" when they started to put slightly nicer names on them, and that was that.
One person told me it was over $7,000 a month for LTC for a person with dementia. A single person gets about $2000 a month CPP & OAS. There are other top ups but still far short of the $7,000. What are reasonable expectations?
I know it was covered in another response already, but people get long term care facilities and retirement homes mixed up. Retirement homes are for the wealthy and only offer assisted care - meals, cleanup around your unit, laundry, and very light healthcare. As soon as you need constant help with ambulating, toileting, or have any serious medical needs beyond "minor assistance", you're going to be asked to depart and head for a LTC facility instead.
LTC itself can be either paid for entirely, or subsidized and based on income if you can't afford them. The smart people like my father shuffled all his money into things that were non revenue generating which cannot be touched by a nursing home, leaving only a small monthly income plus his CPP and OAS. The province picked up the remainder, and he had a very nice and room and excellent care at Hillsdale estates in Oshawa until he passed. He paid all his taxes plus much more in his decades living and contributing to this province and I dont think he nor anyone else in the family felt the slighest bit of guilt seeing him take a little back from the system at the end.
I have a lot of experience with family members and LTC over the years, including currently my wifes grandmother. In the end, LTC is what you make of it in many regards. The older homes are less desireable as the ward rooms can still be oldschool "multiple people in a room with just a curtain between you", but even in those rooms now they're limited to 2 people by law, not 4 or 6 like was the norm in the past. New LTC's like the one my father was in at Hillsdale are built so that even "semi private" rooms only share the bathroom but the room itself is completely private - it just has a door from both it and the room beside to share the bathroom, and that other person is the same sex. When my dad moved into his room the fellow adjascent to him wasn't ambulatory even, so he had the bathroom all to himself basically. Honestly, it was a good setup, anyd one that I'd be very happy with personally if it comes to that.
Given the reality of longer lifespan and a population glut going through, I still think LTC for the masses will be in terrible shape until there is a reasonable expansion of MAID. You fill out a form with your medical practitioner while cognizant that outlines conditions that you would not want to live with. When you cross the line you have defined (as determined by a small panel of medical practitioners) over the rainbow Bridge you go.
Not everyone wants to end themselves, nor would many families be Ok with their mom, dad, grandparents or whatever making that decision, even though it's not necessarrily their decision to make - so they steer people away from the ending while they themselves want instead.
It's definately a potentially difficult decision.
But MAID is not looked upon as it once was, and even if it were allowed beyond the current limits (where you need to be diagnosed with a terminal illness) to be allowed at a point where someone feels like they're no longer enjoying life and have become a burden, I think more would also take that option.
As it is, one only need to read some stories online about elderly or infirm people who are forced to result to oldschool suicide to reach their desire to exit this life, instead of a proper medical exit.
As I sit here in a forest typing this, kilometers from anyone, this thread reminded me of a photo I saw on FB a week or so back from "Dying with Dignity Canada" of a fellow on a hospital bed, in a forest, surrounded by his family, saying goodbye. To me, that seems like an ideal end when one feels like they've reached the end of their meaninful life - go out on your own decision, where you want, the way you want, with your family surrounding you. Peacefully.
If you have some quality of life left, are still enjoying life, I'm not saying just skipping Long Term Care is not the normal path to pursue, but when you reach a point where you're just miserable all day every day and want it to end, with your family onboard with the decision or not, you shouldn't need to be diagnosed with cancer or whatever to be able to make the decision to say goodbye the way you want to, when you want to, as long as there's remotely reasonable grounds.
I don't know how it was pre-pandemic, but my father had to go into LTC in January.
I have nothing but good things to say about the level of care and compassion. The PSWs are cheerful, and they don't often change.
Same here. Some homes are better than others, no question. Some patients are harder to please than others. But (yes, with some exceptions, some places are just run poorly, but that's the exception, not the norm), it's not quite as bad as is often portrayed online, and honestly, many homes are quite nice and the residents genuinely enjoy the experience and being around others they can relate to, talk to, and develop relationships with for social engagement.
The only big issue is that there's not enough new homes being built, but as this thread touches on, if someone can live at home until they're 80 and get to the point where they can't care for themselves anymore, are just miserable day in and day out due to medical issues or pain, being able to talk to your family about skipping the whole LTC thing and saying goodbye on your own terms in a medical environment should definately be an option, and that alone would help alleviate the burder on LTC.
As I sit here in a forest, listening to absolutely nothing except the light breeze slowly passing through the treetops and the leaves falling quietly to the ground as the sunbeams fall on me, I can't help but reflect back on that Dying with Dignity picture (which I can't find right now) and think that this would be the idyllic peaceful place to say goodbye when the time is right.
And no, that time isn't right now, calm down everyone
